UNINTENTIONALLY FUNNY THINGS MY THERAPIST HAS SAID TO ME

Everyone should be in therapy, if only for the hilarious things your therapist will tell you. After writing this list I feel like maybe I should get a new therapist.
  1. That my love for The Sopranos was rooted in my need for masculinity that was absent in my (then) boyfriend
    An unintended SICK burn. Not sure if she was right but I loved hearing this.
  2. "I don't think you can compare your life to the song 'Teenage Lobotomy' if you're technically not a teenager."
    WRONG
  3. "You're right. Men are horrifying."
    After she questioned why I was having anxiety attacks over men I thought looked suspicious (one was on a plane, one was driving next to me late one night, one was in a college class with me) but not women and I said "because men are the ones who hijack planes and rape women and shoot up classrooms"
  4. "Honestly, I think you're in control here."
    When I told her that I lied to a guy I was dating about my age. Again, she was wrong. This was a really bad thing to do.
  5. "Once I farted on stage during a speech about the prefrontal cortex. I survived."
    When she was helping me get over first date anxiety??