My friend @merida has said to me. Believe me when I say each of these quotes was said with the utmost sincerity.
  1. "His muscles are amazing. His attitude, not so much."
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    About the man in this portrait at a Mexican restaurant depicting ritual virgin sacrifice
  2. "I hope Robert Durst didn't ruin malamutes for me."
  3. "I know it'll scare me but I am tempted to go everyday."
    About 4chan
  4. "Oh man. JJ really fucked this up. I'm so sad."
    About a Bachelorette contestant and his poor decision making
  5. "Something bad happened today. On The Road became my favorite movie. It's so bad but I watched it three times in the last 24 hours which I think means I like it."