REASONS WHY I HATE THE DENTIST

I have to go to the dentist tomorrow and I don't want to.
  1. It takes way too long.
    Sometimes like forty minutes. That's two episodes of Friends.
  2. The dentist / dental hygienist pretends to care about your life.
    When in fact, I know Susan doesn't really give a shit about whether or I liked living in Boston this semester.
  3. They sometimes poke your gums with sharp objects.
    And even if they don't, I'm anxious that they're doing to.
  4. The toothpaste in the toothpaste gun that they use tastes SO BAD.
    It's crunchy and makes me want to die.
  5. They're condescending about the fact that I don't floss.
    Tbh, idc.
  6. There's a stupid panel on the ceiling above the chair that looks like clouds.
    It's supposed to be calming but it DOES NOT WORK.
  7. When you leave they make you schedule another appointment.
    I don't know where I'll be in six months, Lisa. Stop fucking pressuring me.