THINGS I DID WHILE MY PHONE WAS IN RICE THAT PROVE HOW SWEET LIFE IS WITHOUT TECHNOLOGY

I accidentally dropped my phone in the toilet and it's been in rice for a day. Life really is better without technology. Look at everything I've accomplished in a mere day.
  1. Wondered constantly what was happening in the rest of the world. Felt totally detached.
  2. Knit 32 sweaters.
  3. Woke up in a panic wondering what time it was, where I was, who I was, why this was happening to me.
  4. Churned butter. Shunned technology. Bought a horse. Planted corn.
  5. Fed all the homeless. All of them.
  6. Meandered the city. Couldn't find my way home. Felt afraid to get lost, blocks away from my house. Had a total meltdown.
  7. Found the cure to the common cold.
  8. Listened to children laugh. Looked out a window and pondered the meaning of life.