THINGS THAT HAPPEN WHEN YOU'RE TRYING TO POOP AT WORK

I wrote this while trying to poop at work.
  1. Someone decides to come in and put their makeup on for ~30 minutes
    YOU'VE GOT A DESK FOR THAT GTFO
  2. Someone comes in and, though there are plenty of stalls to choose from, sits right next to you
  3. The one other person in the bathroom starts to leave, only for an acquaintance of theirs to walk in, prompting them to make small talk for way too fucking long
  4. You're forced into a poop standoff with the only other person in the bathroom
    and then you lose.
  5. You've waited so long to poop that by the time the bathroom is empty, you don't even have to poop anymore.
    but you will again at some point and have to go through the whole rigmarole all over again.