1. Join a bowling league.
  2. Inform others that you are: "going dark on social media".
    Lordy, I'm a douche.
  3. Braise shallots in a 12" saucepan. Add rice wine vinegar. Turn down heat. Let it simmer for three minutes, and then add your skirt steak.
  4. 1/2 oz. of aged rum, neat.
  5. Forget about the past. Embrace your future.
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  6. Flap your arms a lot while screaming: "Wolverines!"
  7. Drink plenty of water.
  8. Throw a pie at a weasel.