I _____________, Therefore I Am

Thanks @biz
  1. Drink.
  2. Drink coffee.
  3. Gaze at the ocean.
  4. Gaze at the ocean while drinking coffee.
  5. SEXT.
  6. SEXT the ocean.
  7. Realize that SEXTing the ocean doesn't work because bodies of water generally don't have cell phones.
  8. Wonder if oceans have Facebook pages.
  9. Google: "Do oceans have Facebook pages?"
  10. Write.
  11. Read.
  12. Wear pants.
  13. Dance around.
  14. Party all the time, party all the time.
  15. Remember Eddie Murphy's awesome song.
  16. Make out.
  17. Make out with trees.
  18. Make out with owls.
  19. Contract Dutch Elm disease from making out with trees.
  20. Spend time in the E.R. for severe lacerations from trying to make out with owls.
  21. Remember that not all forest creatures and fauna want to be kissed by me.
  22. Delve deeper into the mysteries of the cosmos.
  23. Deeper.
  24. Even deeper.
  25. Super deep now.
  26. Wait, too deep.
  27. Yeah, you need to back away a little...okay.
  28. Yeah, that's good.
  29. Still too deep.
  30. Maybe if you stand, like, a foot back...
  31. Okay. Right there.
  32. Deeper into the mysteries of the cosmos WAIT TOO DEEP AGAIN
  33. Remember Eddie Murphy.
  34. Perform "Axel F" with a homemade xylophone made from some water glasses and a spoon.
  35. Ask myself: "Why did I just do that?"
  36. Watch stuff.
  37. Wander around.
  38. Breathe deeply (Okay, THAT'S fine for deep purposes. Just don't get...DAMMIT YOU'RE TOO CLOSE AGAIN)
  39. Remark upon Chris Evan's pectoral muscles.
  40. Secretly envy Chris Evan's pectoral muscles.
  41. Write scathing letters to Chris Evan's pectoral muscles, knowing full well that the underlying tone of my anger comes from the fact that I may be secretly in love with them.
  42. Deduce that I may be in love with Chris Evan's pectoral muscles.
  43. Lift weights until I'm: "swollen like Chris Evans."
  44. Lift cars.
  45. Lift trains.
  46. Lift "lifts", if I were in England.
  47. Realize that I won't ever have pectoral muscles like Chris Evans
  48. Cry.
  49. Whine.
  50. Eat go-gurt.
  51. Have a drink.
  52. Have twelve.
  53. Dig through neighbor's yard for rose petals to put in Hendrick's gin and tonic.
  54. Refer to self in third person.
  55. Refer to self in fourth person.
  56. Realize that I may have multiple personalities.
  57. SEXT something.
  58. Make a list.
  59. Send the list.
  60. Make out with the list.
  61. Apologize awkwardly to the list.
  62. Explain to the list that you misread it's signals.
  63. Drink more coffee.
  64. Overthink
    Suggested by   @kate81