Personal Statistics I Want To See At the End of My Life

  1. Number of times I've SEXTed: 47 kergillion.
  2. Number of houses saved from foreclosure, and helped folks: 5500.
  3. Number of dogs: 2.
  4. Number of tattoos: too many to count.
  5. Number of clients served: unlimited.
  6. Number of drinks made for friends: unlimited.
  7. Number of people that I've helped: not enough.
  8. Number of friends that I've made: not enough.
  9. Number of friends that I can help: not enough.
  10. SEXT