SEAFOOD BUFFET HIGHLIGHTS FROM A FAT 11 YEAR OLD

  1. Shrimp cocktail
    Leave that peel and eat garbage in the ocean.
  2. Drawn butter
  3. Popcorn shrimp
    Pair nicely with drawn butter.
  4. Hush puppies
    Mom's not happy about this one. Tell her you'll burn it off walking the boards, but really take the tram home.
  5. Broiled flounder
    Great for hiding french fries under.
  6. Small dish of shredded cheese from the salad bar.
  7. Chicken fingers
    Great excuse to bring ketchup into the equation.
  8. Steamed broccoli
    Mom likes it because it's healthy. Dunk that shit in drawn butter.
  9. Chocolate pudding
    Usually served in small dishes, but they wouldn't put dinner plates next to the desserts if they didn't intend for you to use them. Ignore Mom's threat of "diabetes."