I taught 5th Grade for eleven years, and I wrote down the funny/ridiculous things my students said. See Vol. 22 here: QUOTES FROM MY 5TH GRADE STUDENTS (VOL. 22)
  1. "I wanted to poke Abraham Lincoln in his rock hard abs."
  2. "Chris Brown was so sweaty and that sweat was FINE."
  3. "Do you wear Speedos?"
  4. "When you aren't our teacher next year, are you going to throw us and burn us away?"
  5. "This is different than gold because you can't make a toilet seat out of it."
  6. "Have a nice life...for the rest of the night."
  7. Student 1: "Why did you draw that?" Student 2: "Because I didn't have nothing else to draw." Student 1: "Yes you did." Student 2: "How much you wanna bet I didn't have nothing else to draw?!?"
  8. "My goal this year is to be the teacher's pet."
  9. "He was gonna tell her I said she was smokin' hot! I did say it, but..."
  10. (After receiving a worksheet) "I can't really read it. I'm sort of blind."