QUOTES FROM MY 5TH GRADE STUDENTS (VOL. 4)

I taught 5th Grade for eleven years, and I wrote down the funny/ridiculous things my students said. See Vol. 3 here: QUOTES FROM MY 5TH GRADE STUDENTS (VOL. 3)
  1. "My dad can hear pudding."
  2. Student: "What are you drinking?" Me: "Water." Student: "Oh, I thought it was wine or beer."
  3. Me: "What do you think this fortune cookie fortune means? 'Consolidate your interest while the lights are active'." Student: "Date all the guys you can."
  4. "He's like Fat Albert, but skinny."
  5. "Stop it, Abigail! You got me in trouble, you Abigailer!"
  6. (Student walking down hallway, holding stomach and grimacing in pain) Me: "What's the matter?" Student: "It's my gut and my butt."
  7. "I just had a weird feeling that I had garlic Texas toast in my mouth, but then I felt really happy and it went away."
  8. Me: "What did you do for spring break?" Student: "A kid beat me up with a metal pole."
  9. Me: "What did you do for spring break?" Student: "I went to Nickelrama. It was a piece of crap."
  10. Me: "What did you do for spring break?" Student: "I had to read with some old people. Who wants that?! I mean, it's spring break! That's girls in bikinis!"