1. "Jock Itch" is an adorable, boyish term for "yeast infection."
  2. For all the lipstick lip prints on glasses at restaurants, there are far more invisible lip prints on glasses left by people not wearing lipstick.
  3. Mental notes disappear forever. Write it down.
  4. Putting a couple of drops of GSE (grapefruit seed extract) in water and swishing it in your mouth can clear bacterial infections.
  5. If you don't feel a real connection to a person, trying to network with them is a waste of both your time.
  6. If you've ever had a kickstarter, your friends like you a little bit less.
  7. People who claim to be socially awkward are just people who only think about themselves in social situations. Everyone feels awkward sometimes. Be friendly to put others at ease.
  8. Sweatpants can be pants. But our kids are going to laugh so hard that we wore leggings out in public.
  9. Buy a bunch of Birthday cards at once. You'll thank yourself later.
  10. The sky is full of helicopters, jets, pieces of rocket, planes, satellites, frozen feces, and human remains.
  11. A mood can be instantly uplifted by a good song, protein, a cocktail, or getting in bed and moaning for a little while then getting up and saying "Ok I'm done."