WHAT I WANTED TO BE GROWING UP, CHRONOLOGICALLY

  1. 1.
    Veterinarian
    That ended real quick when I found out I hate needles and blood and angry animals.
  2. 2.
    Whale Trainer at Sea World
    We went to Sea World when I was in 7th grade, and when I saw the show I was set on become a whale trainer. TOO BAD I'M AN AWFUL SWIMMER.
  3. 3.
    Concert Pianist
    I started playing piano in second grade and continued with formal lessons until the end of high school. I wasn't half bad but after you hear a 7 year old play better than you, you sorta lose hope.
  4. 4.
    Greeting Card Maker
    I had a short stint from 4th-6th grade where I made everyone cards with my very own Hallmark Card software. My grandma swore I could make a living off of this.
  5. 5.
    Animator at Pixar
    I had big dreams, people. I have watched every behind the scenes documentary about Disney animation you could imagine. That dream was dashed when I realized you had to be SUPERB at drawing instead of just kind of artsy and good at copying things.
  6. 6.
    Teacher
    This one is actually working out. I'm working towards getting my teaching degree at Taylor University and I haven't changed my mind yet. That could change if a kid decides to barf on me.
  7. 7.
    And the ultimate dream job...
    A stand up comedian or a featured player on SNL. That is the ultimate dream.