Things to Hide Before You Let a New Guy See Your Apartment
- •The self affirmation sticky notes.Who are you, Bridget Jones?? Ugh, barf city. Definitely hide that shit. Mental note - later make a self affirmation sticky note about being gentle with yourself and not calling your healing process "barf city."
- •That book your mom gave you for Christmas about rape legislation.Replace it with something about... boners being chill I guess?
- •All those packets of horsey sauce.YOU ARE A MONSTER. Oh great - make another sticky note.
- •Pile of unpaid bills.Or just put a little sign on top that says "for daddy 2 pay 💜"
- •The towering pile of sneakers.It definitely smells worse than you think.
- •Litter box.Same deal. While you're at it, reposition furniture to address that one cat puke stain.
- •All those packets of Del Taco hot sauceCOME ON!!! WHY DO YOU NEED SO MANY SAUCE PACKETS??? Either you like them or you don't! They aren't currency!
- •Clumps of hair that you have pulled out of your hairbrush and rolled into balls.You are literally the ONLY person who thinks that is ok.