INEDIBLE THINGS I WISH WERE EDIBLE

@tothemaxxx 's list of drinkable hand soap brought me back to a NewYear's Eve conversation with my 10 college roommates, circa 1996. Here's what I recall: feel free to add your additions/confessions.
  1. Rubber bands
    If you've ever folded a tan rubber band in half, and in half again, etc., until you had a chewy hunk of phyllo dough, you know what I'm talking about.
  2. Styrofoam packing peanuts
    Yes, I know that some of them are made of corn-starch and are semi-edible. I'm not interested in those. I'm talking about the squeaky, non-biodegradable type. Like puffy, white cheese curds!
  3. Marbles
    Cool and minty. Some taste like butter.
  4. Pencil shavings
    Tastes like toffee - crispy and flaky!
  5. Dreidels
    Like fruity "Now and Laters," but don't stick to your molars.
  6. Wrist sweatbands (clean)
    Puffy with a satisfying chew.
  7. Bike reflectors
    Orange and cherry-flavored but with a crisp, honeycomb texture.
  8. Chuck Taylor shoe toes
    Chewy and astringent. Satisfying between meals.
  9. Ponds (TM) cold cream
    Like it sounds.
  10. Pink Pearl Eraser
    The dry wine equivalent to chewing gum or taffy. Not overly sweet but very satisfying to chew and eat. Hints of strawberry, rose and pencil shavings (the non-edible kind).
    Suggested by   @eatthelove
  11. And for dessert...the old-school PBS logo.
    Someone threw this into the mix and it derailed the conversation for a while as we debated what it would taste like. There was no consensus. Some thought it would be crispy and sweet, others thought it would be dense and purfumey, like wax-lips. All agreed, however: the blue P-head would be the best part.
  12. Greenies
    Suggested by   @mattselman
  13. This ping-pong paddle
    Serving suggestion