Things I did at my company's retreat this week

I work in advertising
  1. Got wasted
  2. Experienced a jacuzzi
    Very warm
  3. Spoke to all my British coworkers in a British accent
    90% Harry Potter spells or Oliver Twist/ 5% called them all "cunts" / 5% claimed to be from "north London" (I have never been to London and do not know what this means)
  4. Told several people I loved them
    Discussed this in great detail
  5. Attempted to eat popcorn
    But it was very dry
  6. Asked senior CD if he was planning to marry his girlfriend
    Maybe.
  7. Sang (screamed) ".....hit me baby one more time" with everyone I work with
  8. Danced
    In a bathrobe
  9. Was not even the most embarrassing person there
    We feel no shame, none of us.