I saw a post like this on Tumblr so I have to do it.
  1. He's 900 years old? And he's single?
    -on Yoda
  2. What the George W. Bush??
  3. It's so dark, I mean light.
  4. Wanna know something funny? Actually it's not that funny, it's kinda racist.
  5. That was lit
    -band kid after playing the Nutcracker Suite
  6. He doesn't hang out with many guys… I think his dad died…
  7. Asbetosis
  8. It looks like a four cleaf lover
  9. Is Germany European?
  10. FRIEND 1: NOOO! NONONONO!!! FRIEND 2: What?? FRIEND 1: I opened the wrong app.
  11. Do you ever put chips in the freezer and eat them frozen?
  12. AND you're eating with food in your mouth!
  13. I swear to fuck
  14. You look Chernobyl-y today
  15. Water is everyone's friend
  16. No no no!! Pause! Pause!!!
  17. He reminds me of a bunny with glasses!
    -on a guy who doesn't wear glasses
  18. Dragons can go fuck themselves
  19. We'll have to see next time. (to no one) Until next time, kids, join us!