THINGS THAT I SAY THAT PEOPLE DON'T GET

  1. I only want a diamond if it's a blood diamond
    The value is contrived but if someone died for it then it is worth something, a human life. I say this so people see how ridiculous the whole thing is.
  2. Babies are stupid and useless
    Little morons. Obviously I'm joking!
  3. All I want is for someone to use me as their picture to catfish someone else
    The ultimate compliment
  4. Call every nice car a Ferrari
  5. My bass pro shops keychain