1. My favorite clubs
    The short one works best on small animals. The long one with the big head is best for mastodons.
  2. Tablets I have read lately
    Better Caves and Gardens. Fifty Caves of Grey
  3. Fave caves
    Cave 7
  4. Animals that attacked me last week
    Wooly mammoth, mastodon
  5. Things I like about the hot, glowing light that scares away animals.
    It's hot. It glows. It scares animals. It only takes an hour to get it started,
  6. People I am told I look like
    The Geico caveman, Russell Crowe, Charleton Heston
  7. Tribes I Destest
    The Loinclothers, The Prance-around-naked Tribe, The Proto-Tarzans, The MoonWorshippers, and those fucking Neanderthals should go back to wherever they came from.
    Suggested by @evan