things i would rather do than write this eight page paper

  1. hipcheck a thousand counters/desks/etc
  2. surgically remove all of my fingers and toes
  3. drink warm, slightly expired milk
  4. wax all of my body hair off at once
    ALL. OF. IT.
  5. only wear crocs for the rest of my life
  6. pee myself in front of a large crowd of people
  7. get a splinter underneath my fingernail
  8. go a month without showering
  9. touch a foot
    (i hate feet)
  10. write this list and delete it in .2 seconds probably