ATTEMPTED CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT IN "MAGIC MIKE XXL"

As if we need it at ALL - SPOILER ALERT ( I guess)
  1. Mike's relationship didn't work out. It totally wasn't because we don't want to see him in a relationship.
  2. Mike is really stressed about getting his employee health insurance. So stressed in fact that he leaves all of a sudden after hearing "Pony" on the radio once and can't even call said employee to tell him since Big Dick Richie threw his phone out the window.
  3. Big Dick Richie needs to learn to embody the role of "male entertainer" and really "come out of his shell."
  4. Tarzan was in Operation Desert Storm.
  5. Ken (Bomer) is suddenly a licensed Reiki practitioner, healer of all sorts, Cougar whisperer, very talented musician, and overall ball of complicated emotions.
  6. Mike has a past with Jada Pinkett-Smith, Queen of all things it seems.
  7. Big Dick Richie somehow has trouble finding his "Cinderella"
  8. Tito really loves candy.
  9. Myrtle Beach is really the goal for male strippers everywhere. It's good clean fun and super attractive performers populate it. Realistic.
  10. Mike bought the girl from the first movie an engagement ring and keeps it in his wallet. Maybe the new girl that's just like her will get it!