Please Stop Telling Me These Things

  1. "There's no way any character on Friends would actually be be able to afford those apartments in real life."
    Of course they couldn't. In real life, no one ever faces a studio audience either.
  2. "Romeo and Juliet barely even knew each other."
    I know it's about dysfunctional teenagers that frantically commit suicide. It's also a collection of some of the most beautiful poetry ever recorded.
  3. "Jack totally could have fit on that door."
    They 👏 tried 👏 that. They were too heavy for the door to support both of them at the same time.