1. Floated to the ceiling of a McDonald's restaurant
    Interpretation: I secretly miss eating meat just a smidge.
  2. Successfully ran for Vice President as Leslie Knope (against Trump)
    Interpretation: I think about politics way too much. Like...way too much. @williamharrison
  3. Starred in the movie Passengers opposite Chris Pratt
    Interpretation: I think about movies way too much. And I'm far more into Chris Pratt than I would admit.
  4. Had multiple opportunities to actually yell at people who were rude in high school, but always decided to hug them instead
    Interpretation: I'm very into appearances even in my dreams
  5. Moved to LA to go to open casting calls—not hoping to get cast, just liking to troll on other people's scripts
    Interpretation: I've found my life's calling