ASKING SOMEONE I KNOW IRL ON A DATE

There are many steps.
  1. 1.
    Think, "Hey, she would be fun to date."
    Anything could provoke this. Sometimes you just get a feeling. It's instinctual, which makes it a really easy entry into the date-asking process.
  2. 2.
    Take note of her social media presence in relation to mine.
    Is she following me on Twitter? If not, don't bother. Just kidding! I will think about this for weeks, and I will use it as justification for never asking her out. Has she "liked" a lot of my Facebook posts? She HAS? THEN WHY ISN'T SHE FOLLOWING ME ON TWITTER???
  3. 3.
    Find a time to talk to her in person. Steer the conversation to dating.
    "Look at us, at a bar, having drinks, feeling loose and open and free! Dating is a fun topic, let's talk about how fun dates are, surely I can find a segue in here somewhere and make it about the two of us!" I then proceed to talk about how I don't know how to ask people on dates if I already know them, thus putting it all on her, like she was the one forcing this conversation to happen.
  4. 4.
    Consider sending a Facebook message.
    I do this for several weeks.
  5. 5.
    Send a Facebook message!
    REGRET EVERYTHING. Usually a response won't come, because why would I be doing this NOW? There may have been an opening, but at this point, it's long gone.
  6. 6.
    Open all the dating apps and get swiping.
    This I am good at. Online dating is all writing. I can write my way into someone's good graces. I mean, look at you people. You're still here.