METHODS THROUGH WHICH MY ROMANTIC RELATIONSHIPS HAVE ENDED

Reading Aziz's book has me reflecting back on my past relationships. By my count, I've had five. This is how they ended.
  1. Phone Call (2006)
    She had been distant. I called her to ask what was wrong. She told me she wanted to break up. It was Christmas Day.
  2. Facebook Message (2007)
    I would not count this as a serious romantic relationship today, but at the time, she was only the second girlfriend I'd had, and it was a big deal. After a couple days of her not answering my phone calls, she sent me a long Facebook message breaking things off. I had just gotten home from seeing a double feature of "Sweeney Todd" and "Walk Hard: The Dewey Cox Story." A few days before Christmas.
  3. Face-to-Face (2009)
    Lying in bed after a fight. We broke it off mutually. We slept and she left in the morning. It was the Fourth of July.
  4. Face-to-Face (2010)
    I moved to California. We broke up when I said goodbye. A hug and a kiss, and a lot of crying. It was May 29, which is not a particularly special day at all.
  5. Phone Call (2013)
    She and I fought constantly, and one day she stopped talking to me altogether. A week went past, and I realized how relaxing it was not to fight. I called her and broke up with her. It was the Friday before Halloween.