MY EXES - FOR EACH, A HAPPY MEMORY
I don't always look back on my past relationships with fondness. And now I am forcing myself to do just that.
- •Girlfriend #1We had been dating only a couple of months. It was her junior prom night. Her friends had been mean to her, and she got very upset, so we left the dance early. She stood in the street crying. I took her hand, I held her, and we danced. She started singing "The Way You Look Tonight." We had each other, and all was right with the world.
- •Girlfriend #2Girlfriend #2 and I didn't date for very long. She was seven years my senior, and I was her 19-year-old "boy toy" (her words). She was the spitting image of Talia Shire in "Rocky" - really gorgeous. So much so that I never expected anything to happen between us. We met a party, and soon after, we went out for coffee. We hung out, talked on a bench for a while. Out of nowhere, she grabbed me and started kissing me. I was stunned. It is still one of the sexiest things that has ever happened to me.
- •Girlfriend #3I lost my virginity to Girlfriend #3 on a trip to Disney World. The next day, I told her "I love you" for the first time as "When You Wish Upon a Star" played during the Magic Kingdom fireworks show. I'm not sure I am still capable of experiencing that level of shameless sentimentality - I'm not a 20-year-old romantic anymore. I will probably spend the rest of my life looking for someone who makes me feel half the passion I felt when I was a junior in college.
- •Girlfriend #4Girlfriend #4 and I worked together, and we kept it a secret from our co-workers and our boss. If you've never had a secret relationship, I RECOMMEND THIS WHOLEHEARTEDLY. A knowing glance to your partner in plain sight of your clueless friends is one of the sexiest things imaginable. You share something no one else knows about - and it's really, really hot.
- •Girlfriend #5This relationship was not one filled with happy memories. But there are a lot of little moments I liked a lot - our weird terms of endearment for each other ("booch" and "mom" [don't ask]), the times we would stay in on Saturday nights and watch SNL together, when we would go to Outback Steakhouse and pretend like we were having a night away from the kids, that time we got stoned in the afternoon and went to see Adam Sandler's "Jack & Jill." Small memories, yes. But nice ones nonetheless.