My way of celebrating the start of The X-Files Revival tonight. Do you think this list is spooky?
  1. When someone who's not an X Files fan asks you what's going on at your place tonight.
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  2. When your friend swears he was sure that he had locked the car, but it turns out he hadn't.
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  3. When you need an honest assessment of your spookiness.
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  4. When your partner asks you to cover for them for the unpteenth time.
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  5. When you find something unbelievable.
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  6. When you're sick of men ruining everything.
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  7. When you need over the top sarcastic air quotes.
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  8. When someone uses condescending, sarcastic air quotes against you.
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  9. When your sibling texts you about how it's not okay how many racist jokes are being made in the family group chat.
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  10. When your friend likes some incredibly bland guy.
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  11. When someone says something disturbingly weird.
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  12. When your friend says something inaccurate about UFOs.
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  13. When you ask your friend if they want to hang out.
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  14. When your friend brags about flashing someone for no reason.
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  15. When you just started texting with someone new, and you need to see what kind of person you're dealing with.
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  16. When a meninist asks you out.
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  17. When you need a favor.
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  18. When he sends you a dick pic and you're not sure how you feel about it yet.
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  19. When someone asks you to describe yourself, and you're not from some place with crazy gun laws.
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  20. When you decide that you like it.
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  21. When someone asks you why it's so dark in your room.
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  22. When your friend asks you what you want for dinner.
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  23. When you ask your significant other if they have any condoms.
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  24. When your friend says some weird and random shit.
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  25. When you agree to go on a shopping spree with your friend.
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  26. When twins are ruining your life.
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  27. When you're trying to come up with reasons to watch the Oscars this year.
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  28. When you need to stop your partner from chasing a ridiculous lead.
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  29. When you really do need to follow that ridiculous lead.
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  30. When your friend keeps gushing about this new guy they met.
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  31. When you're hinting to someone that you want to watch Star Wars with them.
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  32. When they still don't get the hint that you want to see Star Wars.
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  33. When someone's hating on you, and you couldn't care less.
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  34. When someone keeps complaining about how everybody is out to get them.
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  35. When you and your friend send each other the exact same message at the exact same time.
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  36. When he tells you he's "not being sexist, just honest."
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  37. When you're literally screaming.
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  38. When someone talks extensively about something you're obsessed with.
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  39. When you're soooo excited.
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  40. When someone tells you about bugs that can crawl up your nose. (1/4)
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  41. When someone tells you about bugs that can crawl up your nose. (2/4)
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  42. When someone tells you about bugs that can crawl up your nose. (3/4)
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  43. When someone tells you about bugs that can crawl up your nose. (4/4)
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  44. When he says he's a brony.
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  45. When you don't know what just happened.
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  46. When you're having that same problem right now.
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  47. When you spot something that looks like fat little white nazi storm trooper.
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  48. When they prove your point.
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  49. When some guy you need something from keeps avoiding the issue.
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  50. When you've overstepped, and you don't really know what to say.
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  51. When your friend got laid and tells you about it in a little too much detail.
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  52. When you don't care.
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  53. When you're flirting and you're trying a little too hard to be cool.
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  54. When your spooky friend invites you for yet another séance.
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  55. When someone asks you what you think of Ted Cruz.
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  56. When you get caught off guard.
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  57. When your significant other agrees that you should spend a hot night together.
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  58. When a corpse is wearing the same out fit as you.
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  59. When someone's being a prick.
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  60. When he asks you to comfort him, and you're not sure how.
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  61. When your mom asks you where you are.
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  62. When your uncle texts you Donald Trump campaign promises he agrees with.
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  63. When your friend thinks they're telling you something shocking, but you're underwhelmed.
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  64. When your friend says their super religious grandparents are coming over.
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  65. When your friend is being gross.
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