Requested by Rose


Thanks @rsilverman for this one
  1. Peeing in my pants in public
    (Let me make myself perfectly clear. I don't mean dribble and I don't mean while exercising. I mean full on pee while wearing jeans and hanging out with some acquaintances.) While this would be an embarrassing thing, it would also be just so cold and wet and uncomfortable, I wouldn't even be able to concentrate on making small talk with said acquaintances.
  2. Choking on my own hair in my sleep
    I'm not going to lie to you, this is a distinct possibility.
  3. Solitary confinement
    This summer I read Into the Wild and then spent many hours researching what happens to brains when they don't interact with other humans for extended periods of time. Let me save you the trouble and tell you right now - it's not pretty.
  4. Going to grad school right after college becoming a thing that is suddenly really normal and assumed sometime in the next year and a half
    This is not something I want to do, and I do not want to have to explain why that is to every adult I encounter for the foreseeable future.
  5. Jk Rowling releasing a statement saying she takes back everything mentioned about Ginny Weasley in the books and Movie!Ginny is now the only Ginny
    Don't even get me started.
  6. Only being able to eat eggs for the rest of my life
    Don't get me wrong, there's nothing I love more than a fried egg on toast (add some salt, pepper, and hot sauce and you've got yourself a deal), but sometimes you're just not in the mood for an egg. Sometimes you're a little sick of eggs, and I don't ever want to be in a position where there's a fried egg with salt, pepper, and hot sauce right there in front of me and it's not something I want to eat.
  7. Climate change finally hits even us middle class white people and there's a huge worldwide earthquake-tornado combo that permanently shuts down all electricity while I'm traveling alone and I have to hike back home from South America
    Maybe I would find a crew of fellow wanderers somewhere along the way and we develop our own little farming community where Ecuador used to be. Lots of new fruits will be created due to all kinds of wild genetic hybrids and we'll be able to healthily subsist off of a brand new fruit species. Eventually I meet someone heading up north and I give them a map to give my family telling them how to find me. Actually, this sounds like a great coming of age novel.