THINGS I WISH PEOPLE WERENT DOING ON THIS PLANE

  1. Letting their 4 year old boy scream "WATER!" while looking out the window and pointing on tempo for 5 hours
  2. Discussing how much better their wedding gift to "Marn and David" is than all of their loser friends- the couple next to me with matching iPad cases
  3. Undressing me w his eyes orrrrrr wondering why I think it's okay to enter the lavatory w no shoes - the overweight bald JetBlue flight attendant who probably just thinks I'm gross
  4. Ah fuck it I'm home