And it's only Tuesday morning.
  1. Pouted and mumbled "I wanted the Dinosaur Eggs..." when Vince gave me a bowl of maple and brown sugar oatmeal.
  2. Tried in vain to convince Vincent that we need a toy train that runs on a track throughout our entire apartment. But not on the floor; on the ceiling.
  3. Stood in the candy aisle of the grocery store, eating loose candy from the bins for like, 17 minutes.
  4. Failed at convincing Vince that I am responsible enough to care for a pet bat.
    Note: I care for our real human baby every day.
  5. Begged Vince for a giant shark piggy bank at Target.
  6. Played "happy birthday" using armpit farts.
  7. Lied to Vince about eating vegetables and doing house(home)work.
  8. Cried real tears when Vince wouldn't change the channel and made me watch some BMX guy do the same thing over and over again and sometimes fall.
  9. Made a "yo mama" joke to a sibling.
  10. Laid on the bedroom floor wailing, "I don't want to clean my room!"
  11. Chanted, "Taco Bell! Taco Bell! Taco Bell!" and then "awwwwwww!" as we drove past Taco Bell.
  12. Argued that cooties are an STD.
    Children argue about that, right?