1. During an episode of Maury.
    When she was suspecting him of cheating on her with her best friend but he passed the lie detector 😍😭
  2. During that same episode of Maury.
    Turned out, he wasn't creepin with her BFF but he was fucking her sister. 😥😭
  3. I burnt the bacon for my BLT.
  4. I couldn't get a pizza delivered at 8am.
  5. I ran out of coffee.
  6. The gas station in town stopped selling Krispy Kreme donuts.
    This fuckin town doesn't recognize a good thing til it's gone.
  7. I sat down, finally, but discovered my phone was dead and my charger was on the other side of the room.
  8. Every single day I drop something.