SHIT OLD PEOPLE DO

  1. Put curtains on their car's back windows.
  2. Carry a coin purse.
  3. Refer to Asians as "orientals."
  4. Have PTSD related panic attacks every Fourth of July.
  5. Play shuffleboard.
  6. Pay their bills in person.
  7. Write checks for groceries.
  8. Type "www." in front of a web address.
  9. Base all their knowledge of homosexuality off of Ellen.
  10. Chew for no reason. Like no food in their mouth, no gum, nothin.