THINGS I LOVE ABOUT BEING PREGNANT

  1. Being a diva.
    Nobody can give me shit for being a lazy, cranky, demanding, emotional, tardy diva. Because I'm preeeeegnaaaaant *pouty face*
  2. My lips.
    Everything swells slightly when you're pregnant. And most of the swelling sucks donkey dick (ankles, feet, face, etc.) but I'm loving these Jessica Rabbit lips I'm puckering!
  3. My skin.
    Sooo soft! Probably because this is the most I've moisturized in my entire life. Because I'm afraid of stretch marks.
  4. Unprotected sex.
    Not a lot has changed there, obviously. But it's nice to not wonder if I'm gonna get pregnant. Because I already am!
  5. Feeling her move.
    There's nothing more magical. It's like this majestic trout swimming around my belly. And it has knees.