HOW YOU KNOW I'M DIETING

  1. I'm hate watching the food network
  2. I'm actually cooking*
    *I can really only sauté veggies and make omelettes. Everything else ends in disaster.
  3. I've stopped asking my friends to go out to eat
  4. I'm constantly googling stupid nutrition questions
  5. I'm picking vodka sodas over whiskey
  6. I'm abusing spices
    My ancestors would be proud!
  7. My mom keeps asking me how to pronounce quinoa
  8. I've stopped using my coco butter lotion because it smells too good
  9. I'm drinking everything through a straw
  10. I won't eat anything that I can't easily look up the calories to
    I know counting calories is not the most effective diet method but it's worked well for me in the past so I'm going to keep scanning barcodes and meticulously measuring out serving sizes.
  11. I cry every time I see bread