'WHAT IF' QUESTIONS MY STUDENTS HAVE ACTUALLY ASKED TO GET OUT OF DOING WORK

Ten year olds + 'what if' questions = maddening
  1. What if I lose my hands? Do I still have homework?
  2. What if there's a tornado tomorrow? (We live in New England)
  3. What if I have three soccer games tomorrow and I break my leg?
  4. What if the moon just disappears? Do we still have to observe it?
  5. What if my mom says I'm not allowed to do my homework (me: "why would she say that?" them: "she wouldn't but what if--")
  6. What if Ms. B tells us NOT to do our reading?
  7. What if my homework gets stolen by a hawk?
  8. What if I have surgery? (Me: "are you sick?" them: "no?" me: "why would you need surgery?" them: "I don't know. Appendicitis?")
  9. What if my favorite movie is on tv?