LIST OF DISRESPECTFUL THINGS THAT HAPPENED TODAY

  1. The rain decided to make an appearance when no one asked
  2. Chipotle is giving people E. coli
  3. An ant crawled on my pizza
  4. I didn't realize I ate all of my Halloween candy until I reached for another piece
  5. Siri told me she couldn't play the next song for me in Spotify
  6. The bag of Doritos I opened contained only 3 chips