WAYS THAT I AM SIMILAR TO MCDONALD'S FRENCH FRIES

  1. Very salty
  2. Great when fresh
  3. Intolerable after a few minutes
  4. Unpredictable in size
  5. Unpredictable in general
  6. Soft on the inside
  7. Usually very oily
  8. Better if you're drunk
  9. Occasionally raw
  10. Always golden
  11. Kids love me
  12. Can be used to bribe a dog to do tricks
  13. Very unhealthy
  14. Incapable of feeling
  15. Mostly made of potatoes