LADIES OF ARTWORK RANKED IN ASCENDING ORDER OF THEIR EMOTIONAL ACCESSIBILITY TO ME

Will you get me through my break-up? Will you tell my roommate to quit nagging? Will you pay the interest on my student loans? Come thru, ladies, come thru.
  1. 1.
    For those days when you need more of a slap on the face than a helping hand, there's La Gioconda....She's judging you for those late fees and you deserve it.
  2. 2.
    You think your problems are bad? Spending five minutes with a woman who has two kids in diapers will make you revel in your freedom til kingdom come.
  3. 3.
    Hey, you may be crying, but so is this woman and she's rocking a hat fierce enough for Prince Harry's wedding. Chin up, buttercup.
  4. 4.
    Mary Magdalene will commiserate with you in the darkest of times. Literally, if you ever find yourself presumed dead in a cave for three days, homegirl will find you.
  5. 5.
    Boob squeeze. Baby goat. My emotions have been stabilized. Thanks, Chagall.