TV GAME SHOWS I WOULD HAVE SLAYED

I could have been somebody.
  1. Supermarket Sweep
    "GET THE HAMS AND THE OVERSIZED FUCKING CANDY BARS, RON!" God, those sweatshirts with the collars were a walking nightmare.
  2. Double Dare
    Marc Summers has OCD. Oprah told me.
  3. GUTS
    I would have slept with Mo for a chance to get a piece of the Aggro Crag.
  4. Where in the World is Carmen Sandiego?
    Who am I kidding? I would've sucked at this. I don't even know where Kansas is on a map.
  5. Love Connection
    I wanted in on all of this: Chuck Woolery, the typed out personal info, the shitting all over the person in the date recap, the geometric print sweaters, the chance that a mulleted man might sweep me off my feet. It was all magic.
  6. Family Feud
    I don't trust anyone in my family enough to even attempt this.