WHY IT WAS OBVIOUSLY JUSTIN'S FAULT

Britney Spears and Justin Timberlake broke up 13 years ago, but the blame is still so fresh in my heart. Thanks for the list request, @sally!
  1. He probably didn't even want to wear this.
  2. You horrible son of a bitch.
  3. This is almost worse than Kevin Federline. JK, I'm not insane.
  4. Explain yourself. In detail.
  5. Who would rather, JT or the puppet? THINK ABOUT IT.
  6. How dare you.
  7. Where's a safe place to rest my eyes?
  8. The broken-hearted prosecutor rests her case, and the jury all picked the wooden puppet penis.