I've online dated on and off for years (currently: off). Sometimes I would try hard, go on lots of dates, really put in effort. Other times... well, see below.
  1. How To Talk Dirty
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  2. Batman
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    It's disappointing how bad most guys are at initiating conversations. I usually ignored one word messages but this dude was REALLY cute you guys. One or two more short, boring responses and I was over him.
  3. Fancy Seeing You Here
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    This is a true story. I recognized him, he did not remember me.
  4. Don't Neg Me
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    This guy made it all the way to a phone number exchange, then messed it up with a classic neg. When I called him out on it, he got supremely defensive.
  5. Seriously, Don't Neg Me
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    Same guy as above. I called him sexist and he accused me of having a personality disorder. I closed the convo with this.
  6. What exactly was I supposed to do with this?
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  7. Seriously, what did you expect from me?
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    Same guys as above. Really not sure why he didn't get back to me after this.
  8. "How have you been?" A guy I used to work with texted me, followed by this screenshot
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    This just happened last night. I was really sure that profile was deleted. Word to the wise, this comes across as weird and intrusive, not clever or cutesy.
  9. A Research Application
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  10. A Research Application is Denied
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  11. Poet Laureate
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  12. When in Doubt: Rhyming Couplets
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    My response to the poet who didn't know it.