0-10 ranking system; 0 is no fault and 10 is I murdered them.
  1. Duke the Springer Spaniel; 0
    I was only 2 when my mom had to put him down while my dad was on military deployment, which was probably a little traumatic for her but I don't even remember the ol' guy. Photographic evidence suggests he was very chill and a very good boy.
  2. Molly the chocolate lab; 0
    When I was 3 my family had to move from California to New York and I said I wouldn't go unless my parents promised to get me a dog. We adopted Molly from the pound when she was 3 months. She was the BEST DOG. So easygoing and loving and just wanted you to scratch her behind her ears forever and ever. We had to put her down when she was 12 because she had a BUNCH of tumors.
  3. Ruby the beagle; 0
    Ruby was a birthday gift when I was 15 and she was a little terror as a pup, but then she got super fat and lazy and she was just the funniest dog. Every day had to begin with belly rubs from my dad or else the day was RUINED. She had liver failure at 9 years old and I was devastated but my dad may have been even more so.
  4. Jasmine the crawdad; 4
    In third grade we observed crayfish for a couple weeks as a science skills exercise, and at the end we could take one home if our parents gave permission. Jasmine lived in a plastic tub in the kitchen and escaped twice, was recovered, and put back. Then... the third time... she wasn't recovered. If I'd re-enforced her home, maybe she would have made it. Instead, we found her carapace behind the stereo when we moved 2 years later.
  5. Midnight, Flower, and Sunshine the Guinea pigs; avg 5.5
    Midnight was my 1st Guinea and he lived 13 days with me; Petsmart sold me the wrong bedding and his urine was releasing a toxic fume. Flower lived 8 days, COD unknown because necropsies aren't standard practice when you take a dying Guinea to Petsmart to claim the 14 day money back guarantee. Sunshine lived with me for 2 years before I gifted her to one of my mom's students; she died of old age a few years later. Should have done a bit more research but overall these were accidents.
  6. Wesley Wyndham-Price the beta fish; 6
    Poor Wesley lived in a party house my senior year of college and drunk people used to fuck with him but he kept on trucking. Then I let his tank cleaning go a few days too long and my roommate really helpfully changed his water for me! But didn't know that you have to put special drops in the water to adjust the pH, and by the time I got home Wesley had turned grey and was sinking. My roommate felt AWFUL and baked me a cake, but it was my fault for letting his water get so dirty.
  7. Yurtle the turtle; 7
    My lil box turtle was so exciting, my very first pet that was just mine and not a family pet. But it turns out turtles aren't super exciting. I ignored him for a few days once until my mom noticed a bad stink coming from his tank. He had died and I hadn't even noticed. I think he had an eye infection. If I'd noticed, maybe it would have been easily cured.
  8. Daisy the Guinea pig; 8
    I took a photo of her and the flash gave her a heart attack. I'm not even shitting you. She was a nervous lil thing and I feel like maybe I should have thought about that before flashing a very bright light in her face?
  9. Charlie the caterpillar; 9
    Turns out caterpillars aren't meant to live in Mason jars and eat dead grass. In my defense, I was 5, but ignorance shouldn't be an excuse.