THIS DRIVER'S GOT JOKES

He's driving @Allys_on and I between two small villages in Sumatra and he's full of gems like these
  1. If you get hot, roll down the window. It's jungle air-con!
  2. Free jungle massage!
    When the road was very bumpy (which it was for 2 hours)
  3. (There are cows in the road; he honks to make them move) I am the jungle police!
  4. This singer, she is from my village. My neighbor!
    Rihanna was on the radio.
  5. How do you put an elephant in the freezer?
    You open the door and put the elephant in.
  6. How do you put an orangutan in the freezer?
    Open the door, take out the elephant, put the orangutan in.
  7. A long time ago we had a big party in the jungle and all the animals came except one. Which one?
    The orangutan (it's still in the freezer)
  8. We can stop here if you want to take pictures. No hurry, take your time. No hurry, chicken curry!
  9. (When some kids waved and yelled hello as we passed) Very cute, yeah? Just like me!
  10. When you get to Tangkahan, you can wash an elephant, but it costs money. You want to wash me, it's free!
  11. Just joking [about washing me], it's a joke. Don't put it in your heart, put it in your bum, that way you [fart noise] and it's gone.
    Perhaps a roughly translated Indonesian saying meaning "don't take it to heart"?
  12. I read in the newspaper today, usually you wash the elephant in the river, but today only, you have to wash the elephant in a toilet.
  13. No money, no honey... but still funny
    TRUUUUUUUUUUUUUUUU