Why I keep my sadness to myself
Besides my dramatic lists I'm not really a feeling sharer I never have been but I didn't think of why till semi recently
- •I've always been told by my family that you don't let people know your secretsOr "your business" as my mom puts it sadness is deff supposed to be a secret if you're sad for more then a day and you didn't go through a break up or a death. Otherwise it's not really considered normal "why are you so sad nothing happened"
- •I've always been told crying in public is a big noooooo like one is never supposed to do thatIf I was a kid and cried I couldn't go anywhere I've been told to put make up on to hide theta that I've been crying and I mean I've deff even been left places as an adult if I cried .
- •I've been told no one actually wants to help you they just want an openingWhich I mean I sadly find myself believing that one sometimes because it has been true with some people
- •On the flip side I just started to notice it's also my mom
- •My mom is my mom and I love her but she is constantly negative around cause I'm family and I'm safeShe talks about how miserable her life has been how unhappy she still is quotes depression commercials.
- •Her negativity is honestly quite draining at times and I don't want anyone else to feel burned out like I doSo I say nothing and I think it's for the best because I don't need to stress other people out with my problems
- •My feelings are also often not validatedI have some really great friends now and I often wonder how they even deal with me but I didn't always have people that were supportive.
- •Yeah Idk I was just in a pretty bad wave of depression for a few days so I shut down and didn't talk to anyoneBut I'm like why do I find that helpful and I guess this might be why
- •I might add on to this but this is all for nowLater list app