7 tips for making other people feel smart and insightful

If you make a person feel smart and insightful, that person will enjoy your company. The point is not to be manipulative, but to help other people feel good about their contributions to a conversation.
  1. 1.
    Take notes.
    I’m a compulsive note-taker, and I used to feel self-conscious about pulling out my little notebook and taking notes during a casual conversation. Then I noticed that people really seemed to enjoy it; the fact that I was taking notes made their remarks seem particularly insightful or valuable. {Read the full article here: http://bit.ly/29fHWep }
  2. 2.
    Refer to a comment that the person made earlier in the conversation.
    This reference shows a person that you’re tracking and remembering their comments very closely. And give people credit for their ideas!
  3. 3.
    If a person doesn’t finish a thought, ask him or her to pick it up again.
  4. 4.
    Use the person’s name—judiciously.
    Sometimes, when someone uses my name, I feel as though I’m being manipulated, or chided, or patronized. But in the right context, it can add a very nice note.
  5. 5.
    Take note of evidence of their admirable qualities
    “That must have taken a lot of research.” “You showed a lot of initiative in starting that.” When someone mentions a fact from the past, my father-in-law often remarks, “You’ve got a good memory.” It’s surprisingly gratifying.
  6. 6.
    Ask for advice.
    We all love to give advice, and feel smart when someone seeks our counsel.
  7. 7.
    Take someone’s advice!
    If you read a book that someone recommends, use a software program that someone suggests, or try a restaurant that someone loves, that person will feel brilliant.