THINGS I FIND IN THE FRIDGE WHEN I VISIT HOME
It's the first thing you do when you come visit. However, what used to be your safe haven in grade school now leaves you going "Wha..??"
- •An almost entirely full gallon of milk, set to expire yesterday.Does no one drink milk anymore?
- •A sad bag of baby carrots that have identical skin to your 80-year-old grandma.Ew.
- •A tupperware containing about two spoonfuls of rice.I mean was it really that vital to save?
- •Another tupperware containing... Oh my, is that leftovers from dinner last time I came to visit??I can't.
- •A bag of apples that have been sitting in the drawer since you graduated high schoolSeriously guys, do a little cleaning and updating every once and a while
- •A single avocadoDon't think you're even supposed to refrigerate those.
- •About three jugs of half-drank juiceWhy.
- •Enough Oscar Meyer deli cuts and packaged cheeses to feed the 5,000At least I know if I'm starving ham-and-cheese roll ups will be my saving grace
- •A shelf full of jams and jellies that no one ever eatsI know that Mama's Farm Homegrown Wild Blueberry jam looks delicious and fancy, but let's be honest with ourselves. No one eats jam in our house.
- •About five mini-key lime pies with the bright orange "Managers Special" sticker on themYou know that means they're trying to get rid of them for a reason, right?