A Curmudgeons Guide to People That Are Annoying When on a Beach-side Vacation

No reason to actually complain but if there's a will... (Most of this is probably about non-Jewish white people, I just can't relate for the most part) open to suggestions
  1. Teen or pre-teen boys that wear Oakleys or any other type of golf or running glasses. They're like white privilege training wheels.
  2. Couples that are really really enjoying each other's company. People are the worst. You don't love, like, are turned on by someone that much, it's not possible.
  3. Parents that are proud/excited of that thing their child did on or near the water or during any other activity on the trip as if their child is the first child in the ENTIRE history of the world.
  4. The couple that are really really enjoying each other's company have that other couple they either met on the trip or are old friends. The margaritaville types. Someone will throw out the an idea for swinging, who knows what happens next.
  5. If in foreign country, the people that try to speak said foreign language and come off beyond patronizing and racist.
  6. The people that get excited about the native flavors and how "exotic" they really are.