When I Clean the House

Malarkey that passes through my brain as I attempt to clean
  1. Why did I make popcorn?
    Just gets all over the place and not into the kiddo's mouth.
  2. Stupid rice dispenser.
    Rice gets all over the place. #filipinoproblems
  3. I want a bigger kitchen.
    So I can have more surfaces to pile crap on, duh! No, more surface space to attempt to look like a home in a magazine with random items that have no function.
  4. I love these swifter floor slippers.
    Leg day everyday and have a clean floor. Best.invention.ever.
  5. I have too much crap on on current counter space.
    Clutter be gone!
  6. Urghhhhh the bathrooms again.
    I have a husband and a 5year old boy. Enough said.
  7. Can someone else empty the dishwasher?
    That's suppose to be the husbands duty.
  8. Put your shoes away.
  9. Can I splurge and have someone else clean the house for me?
    Maybe for my birthday.
  10. What kind of new kitchen stuff can I find at the antique store/Amazon/anthro/mom house?