1. "The rights of the people to find joy in cooking their family and their dog shall not be infringed."
    Just because it would be fun to watch Scalia argue that we now have to allow cannibalism. "Do you see a comma? I do not see a comma. There is no comma. It is right there in the text. It is so ruled."
  2. “We take back #2. Not sure what we were thinking."
    We failed to consider the ramification of such a right within a completely screwed up society.
  3. "Either women have to make as much money as men or they get to work less. You can’t have both America."
    Just as long as we keep it fair.
  4. A constitutional amendment making Shakespeare, Newton, Beethoven, Euclid and Barack Obama honorary American citizens.
    American exceptionalism at its finest. Just kidding about that last one. Or am I?
  5. “Education, being like the one thing that actually helps the world unconditionally, should probably not cost $150,000."
    My daughter starts college in a little over a year. This is very real to me.
  6. A constitutional amendment banning Scott Walker.