LINES FROM JOE VS. THE VOLCANO

I love this underrated movie. It's silly and a little weird but that's because it is a fairy tale about capitalist greed subjugating the common man and distracting him with consumerism, which was ahead of its time for the '80s. Best of all it is funny and even a little touching and has Meg Ryan in three parts.
  1. "What takes more courage? To twice traverse a staircase in flames or to make a one-time leap into the mouth of a smoking volcano? Damned if I know, Kemosabe, but when you're making those kinds of calls you're up in the high country."
    — 1%er manipulative tech tycoon Samuel Harvey Greynamore
  2. "If you need a guide. If you're a seeker and you need a guide, someone to counsel you so you can find your way forward into a spiritual realm. And you're on an airplane. Don't look in first class."
    —Joe's first class seat mate Father Conroy over drinks on the way to Los Angeles. (This scene was scripted but was cut from the film.)
  3. "I love LA. It stinks but it's a great town."
    —Angelica Greynamore while driving the gorgeous pacific coast highway.
  4. "I should kill you. I should rip your freaking throat out. But I'm not going to and maybe you're not so lucky. Cause I'm going to leave you here, Mr. Wa-Wa-Waturi. And what could be worse than that?"
    —A recently diagnosed terminally ill Joe to his insufferable boss, Mr. Waturi, as he quits.
  5. "You say to me you want to go shopping, you want to buy clothes, but you don't know what kind. You leave that hanging in the air, like I'm going to fill in the blank. That to me is like asking me who you are, and I don't know who you are. I don't want to know. It's taken me my whole life to find out who I am, and I'm tired now."
    —Joe's limo driver and something of a fairy godmother, Marshall
  6. "Have you thought much about luggage, Mr. Banks? … It is the central preoccupation of my life."
    —Luggage salesman in one of the funnier scenes
  7. "No. But there are certain times in your life when I guess you aren't supposed to have anybody, you know? Certain doors you have to go through alone."
    —Joe to Marshall after being asked if he had anybody to spend the evening with.
  8. "I feel ashamed because I had a price. He named it and now I know that about myself."
    —Patricia Greynamore opening up
  9. "I've still got my trunks!"
    —Joe
  10. "Dear god, whose name I do not know, thank you for my life. I forgot how big … Thank you for my life."
    —Joe when all hope is lost.
  11. "I am the Tobi. I cannot be the hero. It is my place to hope for my people."
    —The chief of the Waponi on why he can't jump in the big volcano himself.
  12. "What's the problem, are you afraid of the commitment? You'll have to love and honor me for about 30 seconds. You can't handle that?!"
    —Patricia Greynamore
  13. "Away from the things of man. Away from the things of man."
    —Joe